13 changes

     anything about relationships of any type can suck. its hard to be honest and real. its hard to be truthful how you feel about people. it sometimes takes years for truth to happen in your life with other people in it.
      so here we come to my main man peter latemer from wearhouse 13. a show we said goodbye to this week. which makes my heart so sad. the rnd of agents peter,micha,Arte and Claudia chasing strange historical objects to save the world. like micha said "the worlds most dangerous antique road show." which it was. peter, he was something awesome. a wonderful example of how a man can go from stubborn,sometimes foolish and did i say stubborn. to a man who struggled with life,love,danger and relationships. yes relationships, he had many but what started out as a uneasy partnership turned into a friendship which turned in to love. he fought it hard. he covered it with his strange job. he fought it tooth and nail. getting wammyed by strange artifacts along the way.
     why fight , why resist because it was easier that way. we all resisted change and resist becoming something more. for me its focusing on me. that's hard. i fight it hard. i need people to lift me up and love me not a lady to distract me. for me that's where I'm going. no dating all friendships. its the opposite of peter. but still very hard to resist. the need for a person to complete you. someone to make you better. unfortunately it does not work that way.  we need to be secure in self. that's part of the journey I'm on
      change its hard.ill probably get wammyed along the way. it Will hurt. that's why you have others. these are people on this journey who will come and go. some stay longer than others. you need them but you need you to.